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IT was argument galore last week Thursday at the Lawanson Bus-Stop in Lagos as parliamentarians gathered as usual at a nearby news-stand to debate issues of national interest. But on this particular day, the on-going 15th National Sports Festival took the centre stage in the discussions.

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Going by the trend of the argument, it was clear that the parliamentarians were sharply divided over the performances of the participating states at the festival and which state would emerge victorious at the end of the day. "Whether other states like it or not, Edo will win this National Sports Festival because we're the ones that own sports in this country," boastfully declared a parliamentarian who gave his name as Larry Agbontaen.

But Larry was immediately challenged by another parliamentarian by name, Onome Ovie, who posited that Delta had all it would take to retain their title as defending champions. "For where! You think because Edo is leading now that they will win? All that one you people are doing now is gra-gra. This year belongs to Delta State. Don't forget we're the defending champions," he quipped.

But Larry was not impressed. "Which defending champions? Because you people used wuru-wuru to win last time as the host of the Sports Festival? The time Delta government used oil money to daze all the referees and umpires that officiated at the events that they started dashing Delta athletes gold medals that they did not win. Look we're now on a neutral ground and we're going to show that the National Sports Festival belongs to Edo State.

You can see that we're already leading on the medals table," he boasted.

For some reasons, Parliamentarian Akpan Umoh was indignant at this exchange between Larry and Onome. And what was his grouse? "You guys are just talking as if the National Sports Festival is exclusive to Edo and Delta states. Are you trying to say that it's only either Delta State or Edo State that has the right to win it; that victory at the festival should continue to rotate between these two states? A time will come when questions will be asked and answered about why and how Edo and Delta have turned the National Sports Festival into their property. Take my state, Akwa Ibom, for example. We have always produced great athletes that have represented this country very well in many international competitions. But when it comes to the National Sports Festival we don't win. So, the question is, why? " he queried with feeling.

Larry's response to this was: "Ah-ah, which one be your own?

Is it our fault that other states are not winning? Or are you trying to say that we have been doing something to stop other states from winning?" In his own response, Onome had chipped in thus: "If you look at the medals table now you won't even see Akwa Ibom there because they have not won anything, not even a bronze. So, you're not even qualified to be discussing with us on this matter and even complaining. You should wait until Akwa Ibom has won something before talking".

Of course, Akpan didn't like this one bit, but before he could register his displeasure, a parliamentarian by name Chukwudi Ikenebu decided to chip in. "My brother, wait let me help you," he said addressing Akpan. Continuing he said: "It's no secret why Edo and Delta have been winning the National Sports Festival. The governments of the two states have been investing in sports. Like they say, it's what you sow that you will reap. If you invest in your athletes, they will pay you back by winning medals. But if not they will not win anything because they are not motivated.

"This is the problem we're having in my state Imo where the state government has refused to invest in sports and yet expect the athletes to go there and win everything. It doesn't work that way".

Parliamentarian Laolu Akande's concern was why Lagos State, which according to him, supposedly had everything could not challenge Edo and Delta for the title of champions of the National Sports Festival. "I know there was a time that Lagos State used to drag it with the old Bendel State at the National Sports Festival. But these days, Lagos State is nowhere to be found whenever they hold the Festival. In fact, I can't remember the last time that Lagos won the Festival. I have been asking myself what is happening because Lagos State has everything, if not more than Edo and Delta put together to be able to win the festival everytime," he said mournfully.

Chukwudi seemed to have an answer why Lagos has not been winning. "Why are you surprised that Lagos has not been winning? There's too much politics in Lagos. While some states are even using money to buy athletes from other states, sports officials in Lagos discriminate against certain athletes because they claim this people are not from Lagos State. Everything they're doing is all about sharing money because they believe that preparation for the Sports Festival is an opportunity to enrich themselves and their relations, while the genuine athletes are sidelined," he alleged.

Akpan concurred, adding rather humorously that: "If Lagos State is serious about winning medals at the Sports Festival, they should take all agberos and area boys at the bus-stops there. With my naked eyes I have seen some of them run faster than speeding danfo buses when chasing drivers and conductors to collect money. Some of them are very good boxers. If you see the way they punch drivers and conductors over shandy, you will not doubt they can clear all the medals in boxing at the Sports Festival".

The debate had ended on this jocular note as most of the parliamentarians burst into laughter.

Nightmare for a gate crasher

LAST Saturday was a day a notorious party gatecrasher will not forget in hurry. It was a day his usual quest for free food and booze turned into a better-forgotten nightmare. On the ill-fated day, the man who is a known face at almost every Owambe party in Egan and environs, Lagos, had stormed the venue of a birthday party he was not invited.

Unknown to him, the party was one of strictly by invitation. Although he was not aware of this, he somehow succeeded in eluding the eagle-eyed bouncers at the gate and found himself into the reception hall where guests were already being treated to some light music by a live band. Soon he was lost in the crowd of invited guests. But it was not for long.

After waiting patiently for Item Seven, the man soon had his wish: a plate of fried rice straddled with chicken meat and other tasty delicacies and a bottle of ice-cold beer. Unfortunately, it was not his lucky day. The man was busy munching away from his plate of food when he was unexpectedly approached by a lady, the daughter of the celebrant who was marking his 60th birthday.

The lady asked him who invited him to the party and in his confusion, he muttered "Lawal", hoping that there would be a Lawal somewhere among the family members. The lady left without saying anything. She however returned a few minutes later with two bouncers in tow.

Without saying a word, the bouncers pounced on the man, dragged him outside and gave him the beating of his life. Funny enough one of the guests, who though did not condone the man's action, expressed sympathy for him by saying; "At least they should have allowed him to finish his food".