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| Saturday, February 6, 2010 |
He abuses me sexually
Kemi Ashefon
I am a 22-year-old girl dating a guy and we are both from wealthy homes. This affair has been on for four years without sex and he has really been patient with me. Recently, he asked me for sex and I refused because I was a virgin. But when I visited him sometimes back, he raped me and I bled for three days. I broke up with him but he came to beg me and I forgave him. Again, he asked for sex and in order to prevent rape, I agreed. But he was still very rough and it was as if I was raped! He was so hard on me that I almost lost my life. He is never tired of sex and I am not good in bed because I hate pains or stress. I am just through with my master degree and I wish to get married soon, but my friends said that I am too young. Though he has proposed to me and we plan to get married soon, I am afraid of his handling of sex with me. He even complained that I was not good in bed. What do I do?
L.L., Lagos.
The reason for the high rate of divorce in homes is due to the fact that many people married people they thought they knew whereas they never knew them. After about six weeks of unhindered co-habitation, many 'revelations' of personalities emerge and when they cope any longer, they call it quits. But on your part, you have seen the 'person' behind the personality, who wants to marry you. A guy who raped you and made you bleed for days! Apart from that, sex with him is like being raped! I think he has a problem somewhere, which could make his wife ever miserable. My advice? Don't marry him! You cannot enjoy sex with him and that is basic in any marriage. If your bed is dry, peace dries up in the home. At 22, you can wait and search for a better guy.
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